The Fight Against a Generational Norm

By Cindy Lazo

It was one of those quiet boring days in 2003 when the normal sounds of children shouting and laughing on  our block was replaced with the light taps of rain hitting the windows of our first floor apartment. The dramatic music of my mother’s daytime telenovelas played in the background as an over exaggerated fight scene between the protagonist and antagonist ensued as my brother and I watched on, with nothing else to do. Remembering that  our uncles, who at the time lived with us, had purchased a  Playstation 2 console, my brother suggested asking them if we could play and we headed over to their room. We immediately saw that they were engrossed in their video game, but they looked up and  asked my brother to join. As I watched the three of them having fun, I asked when it was my turn. “No Cindy, this is for boys and men to play only,’ my uncle said. “You cannot use it, better yet you should not even be here so go back to the living room.”

For a four-year old girl this was traumatic and scary to hear. I did not understand why my question triggered such a remark and I recall going into hysterics when I repeated it to my parents. Little did I know that this was my introduction to machismo, a Latin form of toxic masculinity, and unfortunately the first of many assumptions or expectations that I would experience from family members as I grew up.

According to Dr. Frank Argote-Freyer, an associate professor who teaches courses on Caribbean and Latin American history at Kean, explained that the term ‘machismo’ is a notion that was born out of patriarchy, and a notion that men are the protectors in society.

“Latin America has historically been a patriarchal society,” Argote-Freyer explained. “Women have had marginalized roles in terms of power in the society, and men were seen as the person that gained employment, that brought home money.”

He also said Latin American culture maintains sexual double standards where men can have multiple partners but women are expected to be monogamous, which also ties into the concept of the man as the breadwinner.

The origins of machismo in Latin culture is linked to the period of Spanish colonization in present-day Latin America and the Caribbean and is seemingly handed down from generation to generation. 

“I think it has to do with the culture, and how we have [a] broad history with that culture–especially women,” Rosa Paulino, Acting Director for the university’s Spanish Speaking Program SUPERA, said. “And although we claim, ‘we do not want machismo’, sometimes we raise our kids to be machistas.”

Paulino also believes that traditions and being surrounded by family has a role in modern-day machismo.

Cecilia Calvo, the treasurer for the university’s Latin American Student Organization, said that she too had machismo experiences in her native country of Dominican Republic.

“It is something I see almost every day in my country. It is really sad, there is a lot of domestic violence happening and for some reason it is still happening,” Calvo said. “It is happening like almost every day–women getting murdered, women facing violence.”

Femicide, a gender-based hate crime that is the intentional killing of women or girls, is an on-going issue in many Latin countries, and since the beginning of the COVID pandemic violence against females have been aggravated due to lockdowns, social distancing and other restrictions that left many women without access to support network and essential services.

One study ascribes machismo to feelings of inferiority, possibly due to negative experiences in early childhood, such as a poor relationship with a father. It also found that lower income men  are the men most likely to exhibit machismo. 

Another study noted  that generational and cultural differences also play a role in men’s perceptions of machismo.

Machismo does not only affect  Latin women. The Latin LGBTQ+ community is also targeted with  offensive terms such as m*ric*n,  used in daily vocabulary in some circles in reference to males who contrast the societal idea of what it is to be a man.

Despite these patriarchal values, changes have begun in some countries where women have gained positions of power–Honduras, which had the highest femicide rate between 2007 and 2012, recently elected its first female president, a historic moment that has yet to be seen here in the United States .

“Do not think for a minute that this is not undergoing change in Latin America too, that somehow the people in the United States are far more advanced than the people in Latin America. That is a stereotype,” Argote-Freyer had told me. 

Calvo said that the older generation in Latin countries are the people mostly close-minded about it.  

“Currently, I see a lot of young Latinos [more involved],” She said. “And I feel like we’re doing a really good job changing the society”

Movements, such as ‘Un Dia Sin Nosotros’ and ‘Ni Una Menos’ seen in Mexico, pushes for women’s rights, as well as protection from violence, and some countries have either constitutionally protected the rights of the LGBTQ+ community, or included clauses into their constitutions requiring non-discrimination  based on sexual orientation.

Paulino thinks that Latin American society has changed a lot from her mother’s and grandmother’s upbringing, but she says there are many things to be done and other aspects, such as certain cultures or political situations, that could make progressive changes a little longer.

“So, if you go to Cuba, the political situation is different than if you go to Colombia or the political situation that people from Venezuela are living [in] now is very different from what they lived in years ago,” She explained. “So I think it is also a matter of understanding each country, understanding each culture and see where they are. But I feel that we are in a much better place than we were and it might take a little more time to get there.”

Argote-Freyer is optimistic that machismo will eventually become a relic and he credits today’s younger generation for defying the machismo values passed down to them.

“You see growing women’s rights movements, you see growing LGBTQ+ movements,” ” He said. “You are seeing a growth of these movements throughout Latin America.”

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